Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Karen's Crossings ~~~~~~~~~ Yes Lord, Yes

Healing! Healing! Healing! The carrot Satan was dangling in front of my face had it written all over it backed with the sound of a smirk Satan’s laugh created as he enjoyed the torture. It was the subject of the scripture I had to read at the annual reading of the entire Bible regarding the woman who had bled for 12 years (Mk 5:25-34). It was the topic of the recent Sunday service about the paralyzed man of 38 years at the healing pool (Jn 5:1-15). One more trip to the church and I’ll bet you anything the subject would have been about the epileptic boy in Matthew 17:14-21, just teasing on the last one.

Tears got me through the reading of the Bible regarding the woman who was healed. That and the gentle hand of the next person in line to read who came up and gave me a hug to strengthen me in a weak moment. The lady in the Bible for 12 years had bled, for 12 years I was disabled with epilepsy. She knew, just as I knew, if we could just get to the cloak of Jesus healing would come.

What got me through the other healing story was the strength of the Lord. The connection I feel with that story, the one of the man at the pool who laid helpless on the ground waiting and hoping for someone to come along to help him into the pool was the question Jesus asked him. That and his determination to come faithfully every day to the pool in hopes of being healed. Yes, that day at the pool Jesus comes along and asks the question, “Do you want to be healed?” The preacher on Sunday admitted to having the same reaction I did when I first read the story, “Well, duh! Yes I want to be healed.”

Still reviewing the story in the Sunday sermon the preacher asked over and over again to the congregation, “Do you want to get well? Is there something you need healing from? Whether it’s a physical or spiritual condition the question pertained to all. The preacher wasn’t pointing his finger to just the back three rows on the left where three of us struggling daily with our diseases sat.

As I sat there thinking about what he was asking I knew in my heart the answer to the question. However, it wasn’t the answer some may have expected to hear. Honestly I have never thought about wanting to be healed from my cancer. It would be fantastic and I wouldn’t turn down the opportunity for nothing. If all it took was to be thrown in some pool I would go peacefully.

The healing that is on my heart is the desire to have those on my ALL UDDERS prayer list healed spiritually. The long list of family members, friends, and even total strangers I’ve been praying for that their relationship with God may be all that it should be.

Indeed the tears that came on Sunday after the sermon weren’t for me but for my ALL UDDERS and the healing I ask for them. In spite of the fact I was having a difficult time standing on my own as church ended the dangling carrot wasn’t for me it was for my ALL UDDERS. As my two granddaughters joined me in the sanctuary all they noticed were tears, they had no idea they were for them and many others and not for me. With a granddaughter on each side of me they grasped my hands as people did for me when I had seizures many years ago. The hugs they gave me, the support they supplied me was an awesome scene in my eyes.

Yes, the very hands I held as little kids supporting their wobbling attempts of standing and walking were now holding my hands as my bone cancer put a wobble in my step. Words can't describe how wonderful it is to have the support around me that I do from all sides. What a treasure in grandma’s heart, what a warm spot in my mind.

Heal? Heal? Heal? Put your carrot down Satan I’m not biting. Any time the Lord is ready to heal me I’m ready too. Until then I’m thankful my cancer is under control and that I have the company of those around me who love and support me, my ALL UDDERS and You Lord. May we all line up in the procession by the pool prepared to be healed physically and spiritually ready to answer when the Lord says, “Do you want to be healed?” Yes Lord, Yes!

***Later in the day after posting this on my blogspot my doctor told me they have found a fracture in my left shoulder blade around a cancerous area. How it happened will remain a mystery forever, now its time to heal and go on with my journey. Heavenly Father, as always I'm in your hands. Looking at the number of bone cancer lesions my body has I shouldn't be alive today. I'm thankful you were watching out for me to get it all under control when they did and that Your caring loving eyes and heart are still on duty. You are my Lord, the one who has never left me nor forsaken me. I welcome Your guidance and strength, I treasure Your love.                             Karen

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